11 july 1999

As I write this, Radio 1 are playing Savage Garden's "The Animal Song", a song arguably even more idiotic than Des'ree's immortal "Life" ("I don't want to see a ghost / It's the sight that I fear most / I'd rather have a piece of toast"). I mention this because, in dealing with the return of Rob Liefeld, it is important to bear in mind that there are depths even his work has not yet plumbed.

Bearing in mind this newfound sense of perspective, CABLE #71 isn't all that bad. No, honestly, it isn't. It's got a plot, a proper one. It's not full of splash pages. Cable's current status living in a more realistic New York is properly addressed and Stacey actually looks pretty good drawn by Liefeld. So anybody looking for a real disaster should go elsewhere. It's not that bad.

Which isn't to say it's actually good. It's not that good either. Obviously the book faces a major disadvantage from the start with the artwork of Rob Liefeld who, after over a decade in the business, still seems unable to grasp the basics of storytelling. Admire, for example, the transition between pages 2 and 3. One panel, Cannonball's in flight and has just smashed up a Sentinel. The next, he's lying on his arse in an alley. That's not a stylistic choice, that's just not knowing how to tell a story visually.

Other classic traits of Liefeld's art are still in full effect; the dreadful sense of body language and reuse of poses (there's at least one panel here I'm sure I've seen before in an issue of X-Force - at least now he's tracing his own work, hm?). He actually does the backgrounds for Stacey's diner pretty well, but only by wildly limiting his use of perspective - see page 6 panel 2 for a particularly good example of that old Liefeld staple, an entire scene laid out in right angles to make it easier to get the perspective right, naturalism be damned. He makes a dreadful hash of Cable's base, though. And, of course, his characters emote only through gritted teeth or gaping open mouths.

There is indeed a certain dynamism to his action scenes (on a purely panel by panel basis; he can't choreograph a fight to save his life), but let's face it - Liefeld is back, and once again it's amateur hour at Marvel Comics.

What of the story? Well, the ghost of Rachel Summers shows up and tries to shock Cable back onto track (since she agrees with Blaquesmith that he's been ignoring his duty) by dragging him to the Days of Future Past. Which is nasty. It must be stopped.

The purpose of this story is clear enough; if Cable has settled into a slightly cosy and domestic rut, a story is needed to justify his return to a more active role. Fair enough. Unfortunately, it isn't a very satisfying story, as it doesn't have much to say about the Days of Future Past timeline beyond what we all knew already - it's not very nice. Credulity is duly strained as Cable stumbles across more and more people he knows. And since the whole thing is clearly presented as no longer being a potential future (which is correct in continuity), it's not clear quite what Cable's supposed to be learning from all this. Why, I must return to action! If I don't, then this timeline which has already been averted still won't happen! Horrors!

Not irredeemable by any stretch, but an awfully long way from being worth buying.

UNCANNY X-MEN #372 begins the highly promoted Shattering storyline, and brings to the fore the bubbling subplot about Xavier's declining sanity.

What can you say about this story, really? It's got a simple point to make, it goes in there, it makes it well, the plot is duly advanced. It's an entertaining read, to be sure, it just doesn't really lend itself to reviewing.

Which makes me feel a bit guilty about not giving more space to it, since it's probably the strongest issue of Alan Davis's run so far. For all that it's vital to the ongoing plot, this is an "at home with the X-Men" issue, a character piece. Thankfully, we've now got the characters as individuals again, and the story gives adequate opportunities for them to show this off.

Also notable is the change of inkers. The previous issues with Kubert's work inked by Tim Townsend produced what has to be some of the weakest art ever published under either artist's name. The arrival of Batt as the new inker sees a return to the levels of quality we've come to expect from Adam Kubert, and is entirely welcome.

Meanwhile, in a subplot, there's Nina from the Hunt For Xavier storyline, being hunted down by other creatures like her. Plainly this is just foreshadowing for the Astonishing X-Men miniseries, but they're nice little scenes.

So. Good stuff. Best we've had in a while. Pleasing.

WOLVERINE/PUNISHER: REVELATION #3 isn't going to get much space because basically everything I said about the last two issues still applies.

You know the drill. Nice atmospheric artwork with a kind of animation cel feel to it, let down on occasion by problems with details such as the way the Punisher's overcoat hangs. Lots of religious imagery, much of it of questionable relevance. Reintroduction of those angels who were hanging around in issue #1 provides a much-needed B plot.

Looks good, feels a bit empty. Consequently, not much to be said.

FINALS the latest of Vertigo's sporadic ventures into the world of satire. The previous one was the prison story Cruel And Unusual, which started out looking quite promising but turned out to be a one gag story which spent four months making a sledgehammer point by variations on the single joke.

Those who have read Finals #1 can probably see where this is heading.

There is indeed an obvious risk that this series will turn out to be a one-joke story that could have been more productively done as a twelve-page short. The gimmick is that Knox State University is run by a psychotic President who believes in all the students going out and putting what they learn into practice as part of their senior thesis. Which is one thing for the film studies people, but a rather more dangerous prospect for the man studying international terrorism. And anybody he meets.

So we have a religion student setting up her own cult; we have a criminal justice major robbing banks; an anthropologist trying to live like an ape. Get it? Well, yes, you probably do, and you probably got it by reading the adverts.

Now, nice central idea, no question there. Full of potential for a surreal comedy story which takes a swipe at the impractical nature of much academic teaching, and as a side issue asks whether there's actually much point in teaching some of these subjects at all if they can't be put to any practical use. But that's just one idea, and it remains to be seen if it can carry a miniseries.

To make it a proper four-issue mini, what's needed is not just four months of variations on The Joke, but a story growing out of The Joke which in itself makes some kind of satirical comment. Because if the plot isn't part of the satire, might as well just call it a short story and be done with it.

The plot doesn't really get underway much in this story, which is why it's hard to make any firm judgement as to whether the series will transcend one-joke hell. The intrusion at the end of what has all the hallmarks of a contrived time travel plot does not bode well; it's hard to see what this has to do with higher education, which after all is supposed to be what we're writing about, right? On the other hand, the flashback to how the university ended up in this state is much more on the right track. It actually has some bearing on the themes.

The other problem I have with this series is that it's wildly inconsistent in tone. It can't seem to make up its mind whether it wants to be wildly over the top or to feature normal and recognisable characters in a bizarre situation. I think it's trying aim for a slightly surreal tone where all the characters are totally normal except insofar as they don't see anything unusual in their surroundings, but somehow it doesn't quite come across.

Anyhow. Probably worth skimming another issue to see if it has anything more to say, or if that's it. Has its moments, but I'm not convinced yet.