The less said about X4, the better.

Here's the big idea: four of the X-Men re-enact the Fantastic Four's origin and get the same powers.  Now, that's a really, really stupid idea.  It gets even stupider when you decide to give the stretching powers to Wolverine - yes, that's right, stretchy adamantium.  Oh dear.

This is the sort of story concept that you might just about have got away with if you were writing a DC book forty-five years ago.  To write a story this downright idiotic in 2005 and get away with it, you have to play it for laughs.  You can play it deadpan if you want, but it's got to at least show some sign of acknowledging its own ridiculousness.

Terrifying, X4 seems to be taking itself in deadly ernest.  Reed solemnly discusses the implications for whether the Fantastic Four's own powers are truly random variations.  Hilariously inept attempts are made to justify the four X-Men as elemental analogues.  (Why does Wolverine represent water?  Er, because adamantium is liquid, of course.  When you melt it.  Seriously, that's the reason given.)

The worst kind of dreadful - not quite bad enough to be entertainingly bad, but far too bad to actually be enjoyable on any level.

Rating: D

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