I am losing patience with Ultimate Nightmare.

Warren Ellis wrote a column a couple of months back in which he deplored the tendency in some quarters to use the word "decompressed" as if it were synonymous with "slow and boring."  As he rightly says, decompression is a tool, which can be used well or used badly.  Depending on what you want to achieve, it might be the right tool for the job.  Or it might not.

Ultimate Nightmare is decompressed.  It is also slow and boring.  In issue #1, nasty messages started coming from Russia, and the X-Men and the Ultimate independently decided to investigate.  In issue #2, they travelled to the site.  In issue #3, they wander around the complex for a bit, and fight a couple of run down supervillains.  And that's it.

True enough, there is action in this issue.  There is fighting.  But there is bugger all advancement of the plot which, frankly, has barely inched forward since issue #1.  What we get here is a repeat of basically the same sequence, once with the Ultimates and the Unicorn, and once with the X-Men and a character I take from dialogue to be intended as an Ultimate Crimson Dynamo, though the art makes him look a lot more like the Juggernaut. 

The common theme, of course, is that both were originally created as Cold War era Russian villains.  The Ultimate Universe doesn't even have a Cold War phase in its history, so these characters require more than a little tweaking to fit them in.  There may be an interesting explanation for all this.  But at this pace, I dread to think when it might be coming.

Ultimate Nightmare is, apparently, a prelude for the story which is going to follow in Ultimate Secret.  One can only wonder why it was felt to merit a five issue miniseries in its own right.  It's the sort of concept Ellis has done much more effectively in a single issue of Global Frequency, and this book just isn't in the same league.

Incidentally, we have fill-in art in this issue.  This is one of the books being pushed as part of the faintly ridiculous "Young Guns" promotion (a name which conjures up images of Andrew Ridgeley every time I hear it - possibly not what they had in mind).  However, this time round we've got Steve Epting pencilling instead.  Epting is a very good artist and perfectly at home here - low light suits him.

Looks alright, anyhow.  But painfully slow.

Rating: C-

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