STORY: "X-Cutioner's Song, part 1: Overture" (23 pages)  Lila Cheney invites Professor Xavier to address her anti-racism concert in Central Park. His speech, calling for tolerance of mutants, gets a mixed reaction. Then, a man appearing to be Cable appears from the crowd and shoots Xavier. The X-Men present in the crowd try to stop the assassin, but he teleports away. Meanwhile, in Salem Center, Cyclops and Jean Grey are abducted by the Horsemen of Apocalypse.

What you need to know:
Not much. This is the first part of X-Cutioner's Song, the big summer crossover of 1992. The storyline is enormously important. If you read X-Force. If you're just following the X-Men, it's a nice little story but not enormously important to the overall plot.

The story continues in X-Factor vol 1 #84, X-Men vol 2 #14 and X-Force vol 1 #16, in which it turns out that the Horsemen aren't actually working for Apocalypse at all (Mr Sinister is posing as Apocalypse and stringing them along); Sinister hands Scott and Jean over to Stryfe in exchange for a canister (which we later find out has the Legacy Virus in it, and not what Sinister was expecting at all); Apocalypse's real henchmen find out what's happening and wake him from suspended animation, but it's too early and he's not feeling very well; X-Force get hunted down and captured on suspicion of collaborating with Cable; Cable races around trying to avoid getting captured and clear his name; Xavier turns out to have been shot with some weird techno-organic bullet which infects his body; and Sinister starts giving the X-Men hints about what they should do. Basically.

Oh, and if you're the sort of sad bastard who insists on buying everything in mint condition, you're looking for a comic in a sealed plastic bag, with a trading card. Isn't that just thrilling?

Comments:
Ah, now this is what we buy the X-books for. Crossovers.

X-Cutioner's Song was the big crossover of 1992, meandering its way through this title and X-Men (the X-Men were key to the plot), X-Force (X-Force were key to the plot) and X-Factor (X-Factor flailed around contributing nothing to the plot, but the book was forced to take part despite the objections of writer Peter David). Crossovers are rather out of fashion in online fandom at the moment, but I don't care. I like X-Cutioner's Song, always have.

Sure, nobody's going to put this forward as an all-time classic of comics, but it's really pretty good (unless, of course, you happened to be reading X-Factor and had to sit through three months of unrelated drivel - though the art was nice). It's got a decent, well worked out plot; it's got villains who pose a genuine threat, even if nobody seriously believes Xavier's going to die; it's got pretty good art across the whole storyline; and dammit, it's just good fun. If you're judging it against other stories, it's a good fun romp. If you're judging it against the usual standard of X-books crossovers, it's miraculously good.

This issue gets the task of doing the set-up, and with the plot sprawling over a whopping twelve issues (a year's worth of storyline in normal circumstances) there's actually a fair amount of space for the characters to talk to one another. Although there's also a satisfyingly extended brawl with the Horsemen of Apocalypse, if you like that sort of thing. Xavier also gets to give a speech about the evils of prejudice, for the benefit of those who need the subtext spelled out with a big neon sign. Lobdell gets away with it by having the crowd pretty much boo him off stage.

It's unfashionable, it's a crossover, but I like it. So sue me.
 

FEATURE CHARACTERS
Professor X (last in X-Men vol 2 #13; next in X-Factor vol 1 #84, then in X-Men vol 2 #14, then in X-Force vol 1 #16); Archangel, Bishop, Colossus, Iceman, Storm, Gambit, Rogue (all but Colossus and Iceman next in X-Factor vol 1 #84, then all in X-Men vol 2 #14, then all in X-Force vol 1 #16), Cyclops (the latter three all last in Excalibur vol 1 #58) and Jean Grey (the latter two both next in X-Factor vol 1 #84, then in X-Men vol 2 #14, then in X-Force vol 1 #16, then in X-Factor vol 1 #85, then in X-Men vol 2 #15, then in X-Force vol 1 #17, then in issue #296)

GUEST STARS
X-Factor II: The Multiple Man, Quicksilver and Strong Guy (all between X-Factor vol 1 #83-84)
X-Force I: Boom-Boom, Cannonball II, Rictor, Siryn, Sunspot and Warpath (all between X-Force vol 1 #15 and X-Factor vol 1 #84)

SUPPORTING CHARACTERS
Charlotte Jones (last behind the scenes in issue #288; next in issue #294); and Lila Cheney

VILLAINS
The Friends of Humanity (between issue #291 and Sabretooth #1)
The Horsemen of Apocalypse: Caliban (last in New Mutants vol 1 #91), Famine and War I (the latter two both last in New Mutants vol 1 #91; all three next in X-Factor vol 1 #84)
Mr Sinister (behind the scenes between X-Factor vol 1 #78 and #84)
Stryfe (between X-Men vol 2 #13 and X-Force vol 1 #16)

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